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Sunday 6 June 2010

nothing...

I really have nothing to say, so don't ask why I'm writing an update...hoping that something will just flow? perhaps.

There's really not been a lot happening. I had a rubbish day at work yesterday, where I was so mucked about I didn't know if I was coming or going, and ended up in an awful mood for the entire night which meant it took me ages to get to sleep. This wasn't helped by the ridiculous sinus headache I had going on which took over my entire face and head and the painkillers I took made me dizzy when I closed my eyes...happens every so often I suppose though. Basically, I went to my own unit (2CB) and was sent next door to 3, where they also hadn't allocated me. I sat for 1.5 hours waiting to find out what I was doing, before being sent to 1, where I linked for an outing and on my return was sent up to junior campus, to a unit I'd never been in, with staff and clients I had never met. Needless to say I wasn't impressed, and to top it all off a very rude member of staff jumped down my throat about something completely irrelevant. Jumping to conclusions before seeing all the evidence. Sounds stupid when written down, and I don't have a problem with being moved about, I just wish they'd have made up their mind sooner and let me get on with my day!

All that aside, I have absolutely no money, which is making getting through this month seem like a mamoth task, and I hate it when silly things like money play on my mind. At least we bought lots of food after pay day so we shouldn't go hungry. I'm relying on the old credit card which was so nearly cleared off! Yet another thing I'm not impressed about.

There have been a lot of people on my mind lately  - ex friends, new friends (mainly online), acquaintances, family - for various reasons. The main person that keeps cropping up in my dreams is an ex friend and I wish I could just get over it!! It's been over 1.5 years since we stopped talking, but the 16 years of friendship we had before that seem to be making it extremely difficult to let go. At least it doesn't make me upset anymore or consume my thoughts when I'm in a quiet place, but I just really need to let go. The journey we had from primary school, right through secondary and on into her college and my uni years...it just seems irrelevant when we're not even able to acknowledge each other in passing, never mind speak. It was by no means a smooth journey, it had some epic bumps along the way but I thought that's what made us good friends...we knew the good and the bad in each other. I'm scared to look her way incase she can see that I'm still hurting.

Anyway, I'm going shopping today to help my sister finish her prom outfit, and also to get baby gifts for a baby shower I'm going to tomorrow. Claire is absolutely huge! I love baby stuff, it's all so cute, and Laura has bought some exceptionally cute things for baby Molly :)

1 comment:

  1. Old friendships are always hard to break. In someways it's like boyfriend/girlfriend relationship in that you will always care It's only natural for you to still feel hurt. I hope things get easier for you soon :)

    I love baby stuff!!! They're just so tiny and so perfect!! Xx

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